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Chilly Weather Reports

  1. It was so cold...
    a herd of reindeer thundered into the travel agency looking for brochures on new migration routes!

  2. It was so cold...
    walruses were lumbering into the building supply store looking for more insulation!

  3. It was so cold...
    I had to drill through ice just to get the coffee out of my cup!

  4. It was so cold...
    we couldn't read our daily newspaper until it thawed out the next day. Publishers started making up the news and printing a day early so we could read it on time. Sometimes they were right.

  5. It was so cold...
    Scotsmen started wearing pants!

  6. It was so cold...
    when I got lost, the only good thing I could think of was of how well preserved I'd be when somebody finally found me.

  7. It was so cold...
    when the geese flew off - they took the pond! The air force thought the big oval of ice flying through the air was a UFO!

  8. It was so cold...
    I thought I had astigmatism, but it was just a film of ice over my eyes.

  9. It was so cold...
    they took down the sign that said "Water Park" and put up a new one that said "Luge Run".

  10. It was so cold...
    we didn't have to shower after exercising - we'd just chip off the layer of sweat and be on our way!

    Links to COLD PLACES!

  11. It was so cold...
    Dad started the car by yelling "mush"!

  12. It was so cold...
    my snowmobile refused to mobile!

  13. It was so cold...
    I put my sleeping bag UNDER my jammies!

  14. It was so cold...
    Dad traded in the family car for a zamboni!

  15. It was so cold...
    hunters were coming home empty handed - bullets refused to leave the warmth of the gun barrel!

  16. It was so cold...
    instead of yelling "freeze", the cops just yelled "go outside"!

  17. It was so cold...
    the mailmen had to change their motto - they decided that there ARE some things that can keep them from their appointed rounds!

  18. It was so cold...
    a seal was sunning itself on the ice floes in our hot tub!

  19. It was so cold...
    we thought we'd found our own terracotta army buried in the snow, but it turned out to be the people who were waiting in line for the bus yesterday!

  20. It was so cold...
    we didn't have rainbows - we had snowbows!

  21. It was so cold...
    muskoxen were trying to trade in their woolly coats for insulation filled gore-tex!

  22. It was so cold...
    everyone was walking around brrrfooted!

  23. It was so cold . . .
    the murres had a big meeting down south and decided that next time - they'd migrate WEST!

  24. It was so cold...
    skateboards worked a whole lot better without the wheels!

  25. It was so cold...
    sheep were demanding their wool back - in the form of heavy sweaters!

It Was So Cold...
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